hitting the sauce

for fun is fine but
when you start sucking the juice
to forget then son you
got a problem
it just makes the whiskers grow 
darker on
the monster's face
makes night roll blacker than
it really is
makes the cock draw deeper
back into the belly
twists yr finest dream into a 
crippled little bird that peck
brown balls & scratches shit
on the edge of 
yr mind 


i could puke up
my guts this moment
one beer left 
sunday
two shots of port & 
then  tomorrow dt's
nothing to live for but the 
knowledge that if i do live
alcohol will always be there
somewhere like a sweet pain
river floating me on to
salvation even if i'm
dead in your
mind











psychotic episode

insane & crazy after 4 quarts
of t-bird and 18 dime beers at
the hickam beer garden i went on
a rant smashed  way across
parking lot with
fire extinguisher liberated from
a barracks burglarized
smashed cars terrorized everybody
in the hawaiian night
into the main terminal 
so much fun bashing things &
shooting bird colonels with the
icy spray from 
ray gun until the loads of APs came
cornered  in a broom closet
held out like cluster until 
ammo expended & then crash
aswarm under a sea of blue uniforms
beaten & stomped to a pulp
taken to the provost marshal
big dude sitting behind his podium &
i figured to make a new doorway
ran into the wall & buried head
to the shoulders in drywall
beaten stomped & bound to a litter
taken to the dispensary
faked unconsciousness to get
some slack in the restraints 
& then tried to choke the asiatic doctor
who bent to see if alive
or dead more beating & loaded
in the meatwagon taken to little
tripler neuropsychiatric
sadistic escort twisting leg 
on the way but i smile & say
you puny weak motherfucker can't
you even break it
at the nuthouse tossed into a room
told to change into PJs & cloth
shoes & did so
then noticed glass door leading to
outside  found it was not locked
freedom on the parking lot but
no keys in
the cars to escape in reality
headed across road clad in my
nuthouse duds up the hill to
military housing unit on hill
light on porch in back  ease
up hear footsteps & slip back into
shadows attractive young woman in 
slip comes onto porch begins
putting children's toys in
a box
slip back up to screen
make worst battle face  scream
smashing screen frame & she
flees screaming JEFF JEFF JEFF
at the top of her lungs 
run and dive in ditch on slope
behind building & soon light
around corner flashlight held
beneath pistol as jeff scans yard
for intruder maniac 
light arcing in sweep that
will reveal position there
face down in the weeds 
bury face and feel more
than see the light pass over 
jeff no doubt fearful looking out
corner of eye for surprise attack
misses nutcase in weeds
then the roar of two big duce
and halves offload platoon of
armed men who fan out & start
up rise with weapons at the ready
fear sudden swarm of lead bees
from hinky searchers for psycho
jump up suddenly clasp hands on 
head & yell surrender loudly
in the lilac hawaii night
sunk again down under gun
butts and boots although offer
no resistance beaten to pulp
finally merciful darkness like
a black curtain falls
awoke three days later in white
room strapped to baby bed affair
drips running in arm think death
is this heaven or hell 
black orderly in starchy white
uniform arrive  
ask where am i  
he says man don't you remember w
hat you did you're in 
a world of shit
shrink later said impossible to
survive with blood alcohol level 
but somehow did by miracle
as it turned out world of
shit wasn't so bad
was laid to a psychotic
episode brought on by too
much juice 
eventually sent back to
duty station to help keep america 
free & safe from all enemies
including lunatics & 
crazy people
   


© 1997 
Jim Chandler