Lyrics from KING YAKKO (Episode 10)
by Peter Hastings
The King
Guards: The king!
PM : Good folk of Anvilania
We welcome our new king
So raise your hammers high
And let the anvils ring.
Chorus: We let the anvils ring
Guards: To welcome our new king
The king!
---
Let the Anvils Ring
Yakko : Let us introduce ourselves
O people of this land
Wakko : We are the Warner brothers
Dot : With sister close at hand.
Yakko : I bet you all are wondering
Who is this young unknown?
And why am I inheriting
The Anvilanian throne?
Men : Yes, why?
Women : Yes, why?
Crowd : Oh, please, please tell us why.
Yakko : The bottom of the family tree
Starts with Yakko; that is me.
I'm the cousin to the sister
Of son's niece's brother
Of the uncle's daughter's father
Of the nephew's sister's mother
And my grandpa's only cousin
Was the King's daughter's sibling,
But they're all gone,
Crowd : So that is why
Yakko : I am now your king!
Crowd : He is now our king!
Yakko : Yes, I am now your king!
Repeat what I just said!
Crowd : Repeat what I just said!
Yakko : And let the anvils ring!
(Anvil Chorus plays)
YW+D : Old King Yakko's mania
(Anvils play "E-I-E-I-O")
YW+D : Was for Anvilania!
(Anvils play "E-I-E-I-O")
Yakko : So good citizens, I pledge to you
I'll do the best that I can do
For honor, country and the king
Let the anvils ring!
Crowd : Let the anvils ring!
Yakko : Let the anvils ring!
Chorus: Let the anvils ring!
---
In Dear Old Anvilania
Yakko : In dear old Anvilania
Everyone's our friend
Dot : We want to meet you all
Wakko : And shake you by the hend!
(spoken) Hend, hend -- it rhymes!
---
Musical Chairs (Sung to Pop Goes the Weasel)
YW+D : You never know when we're gonna stop
We might go on forever
You could get sick waiting for us
So we could stop--
---
This Means War
Yakko : And so I stand corrected
Not everyone's our friend
Dot : The dicator,
Wakko : He wants a war,
YW+D : So our country will defend!
Crowd : This means war,
This means war,
This means war!
YW+D : Of course you know
This means War...
...ners!
---
Anvilanian Anthem (Sung to My Old Kentucky Home)
D+W : Oh the anvils shine
In my old Anvilanian home.
---
War Report
YW+D : We thank you all for your support
And of the war, we now report
Yakko : Our country had been threatened
By a mean and crafty man
Dot : He wanted all our anvils
Wakko : And our country in the can.
YW+D : We gathered up the bravest men
But they all ran away
Yakko : So Wakko, Dot, and I, the king
Went off to earn our pay.
Dot : The battle, it was fierce
Yakko : But we rolled with the punch
Y+D : The odds, they were against us
Wakko : Six hours without lunch!
YW+D : We fooled the old dictator
And his castle was destroyed
But we're not mean, and now with us
He's gainfully employed.
Umlatt: (spoken) This anvil was so big...
Crowd : How big was it?
(clang!)
Umlatt: This big.
Yakko : So now won't you join us
For country and the king
YW+D : Raise your hammers high
And let the anvils ring!
Men : Let the anvils ring!
Crowd : Let the anvils ring!
Lyrics from NO PAIN, NO PAINTING (Episode 11)
Music traditional (Frère Jacques). Lyrics by Peter Hastings.
YW+D: Frère Warner Frère Warner What's that mean? Keep it clean! Yakko is a yakker Wakko is a snacker! Dot's plain cute So's this boot!Transcribed by David Moisan
Lyrics from LES MISERANIMALS (Episode 11)
Musical score by Steve Bernstein.
Lyrics and dialog by Deanna Oliver.
Camenbert (parody of Confrontation)
Music by Richard Stone.
Camenbert: Runt Valrunt, I'll track you down, I swear.
No matter where you run, I will be there.
I, Camenbert!
---
At the End of My Fork (parody of At the End of the Day)
Miserable Diner : At the end of my fork is an unknown food product!
Tristesse : You miserable fool, that's a bit of sardine!
Miserable Diner : If that's a sardine, then I'm the bloomin' May Queen.
Chorus of Customers: Forgive us, sir, but your gourmet pies are obscene.
We want protein!
---
Look at Rita (parody of Lovely Ladies)Assigning cat names in order of appearance, as listed in the credits.
(Kitty Dukockis?): Look at Rita, primping up her fur.
(Cat Ballue?) : Thinks she's such a fancy one
Just listen to her purr.
(Kitty Litter?) : Arrogant Rita, oh so marvelous.
All three : Haughty precious kitty, better than the rest of us.
PU, girl, you're odoriferous!
Kitten : Guess what I saw; I saw it with me own eyes.
Monsieur Tristesse has no more meat for his pies.
Believe it or not, he threw Fat Cat in a pot.
Fat Cat escaped but if Tristesse has his way
He'll make a Fat Cat soufflé!
Dukockis: No, not a cat!
Kitten : It was Fat Cat.
Ballue : It was a cat?
Kitten : A kitty cat!
All four: Oh, save us, God! We're living with a Sweeney Todd!
Ballue : Give him Rita; Rita's nice and fat!
Dukockis: Rita must be tasty, why, she's an aristocrat.
All four: To the kitchen; throw her in a vat!
(Rita roars)
---
Flat in Gay Paree (parody of Castle on a Cloud)
Rita: There is a flat in Gay Paree
Safe on a tree-lined avenue
No cats à la carte on the menu
Not in my flat in Gay Paree.
There is a chef of fine cuisine
He is a vegetarian
As he prepares a fine banquet
He says, "Rita, you're my beloved pet."
I know a flat where I can nap
Safe on a chair or in a lap
I won't end up in a recipe
Not in my flat in Gay Paree.
---
I Am Definitely... (parody of Who Am I?)
Runt: I am definitely...
I am definitely...
I am definitely...
Runt...
Val...
...runt!
Definitely!
---
Rita and Runt (parody of Red and Black)Runt: Rita, glad I found you safe and sound. Rita: Runt, where the blazes have you been? Runt: Rita, doing straight time in Le Pound. Rita: Runt, get me out of this pen! ---That Hole is Much Too Small (parody of A Little Fall of Rain)
Rita: Please don't be upset, Runt
It hardly hurts at all
But that hole is much too small
To pull my body through.
What were you thinking, you big buffoon?
Don't worry; it's okay
The pain will go away.
He must have confused me for a cartoon.
---
Do You Hear the Poodles Bark? (parody of Do You Hear the People Sing?)
Poodles: Do you hear the poodles bark?
Barking the barks of angry mutts.
Runt : It is the high-pitched yap of pedigree dogs
Whose mouths will not be shut.
Poodles: We will break down the prison wall
We will destroy the restaurant.
We're revolting poodles following Runt Valrunt!
---
Dig Down (parody of Look Down)
Dogs : Dig down, dig deep, Les Miseranimals!
Dig down, dig deep, to freedom through a tunnel!
Dukockis: Dogs and cats shouldn't fraternize!
Rita : Do you wanna end up in meat pies?
Ballue : Rita's right; let's use our paws.
Litter : I ain't gettin' dirt between me claws.
Rita : (spoken) Get over yourself.
Dogs and cats: Dig down, dig deep, Les Miseranimals!
Dig down, dig deep, to freedom through a tunnel!
---
Bitten in Ze Butt (parody of Master of the House)
Tristesse: Bitten in ze butt
Got an awful tear
Took a little nibble from my derriere!
I will get you in ze end, dog
You'll regret you bit me, chum.
Ooh, I am so irritated
I got bitten in ze bum!
---
Camenbert and Runt (parody of Confrontation)
Camenbert: Valrunt, you cur, there's no escaping me!
Ha ha, ho ho, ha ha ha ha hee hee-eee!
Camenbert: Runt:
You'll go back to the Pound. But I protest, I'm an innocent stray
You'll go back. Confess, Camenbert, you know it's true.
A dog like you I did not steal
cannot run free, that bone,
A dog like you. It was you.
Runt: Toodleoo!
---
At the End of the Road (parody of At the End of the Day)
Rita: At the end of the road is the city of Paris.
At the end of the road is the city of light.
The city of romance,
All : We'll eat, drink, be merry and dance,
And with any luck at all we'll find shelter tonight.
Vive la France!
Transcribed by C. David Tallman and Mark Hadley
Lyrics from WEST SIDE PIGEONS (Episode 12)
Musical score by Steve Bernstein.
Lyrics and dialog by Deanna Oliver.
Goodfeathers (parody of Jet Song)
Music by Richard Stone.
BP+S : Here come the Goodfeathers cooin' at you
That no sparrow can perch on Scorsese's statue
On our ever-lovin', beakin', buggin'
Statue!
Goodfeathers!
---
Carloota (parody of Maria)
Squit: Carloota!
I just met a bird named Carloota.
And please don't think me rude
But I think I'd like to brood
With Carloota!
Carloota!
Carloota!
(swallowed by Crupkitty)
Carloooooootaa!!!
---
Scorsese's Head (parody of America)
(FS = Female Sparrow(s), MS = Male Sparrows)
FS : We wanna stay here on the rooftop!
MS : We don't!
MS : We'd like to perch on Scorsese's head!
Why can't we perch on Scorsese's head?
Goodfeathers perch on Scorsese's head!
Sparrows should perch on Scorsese's head!
FS : On the rooftop we get lots of sunshine.
MS : Don't want to perch on a clothesline!
FS : Up here we have a boid's-eye view.
MS : Humans drop food by the statue!
FS : We'd like to perch on Scorsese's head!
MS : Why can't we perch on Scorsese's head?
Goodfeathers perch on Scorsese's head!
All: We're gonna perch on Scorsese's head!
---
I Feel Feathery (parody of I Feel Pretty)
Bobby: Hoo-Hoo! Look at Mr What-a-Difference-a-Day-Makes over here!
Pesto: Heh heh! Spiffin' up for the rumble, Squit?
Squit: No, I have a date with Carloota. There's no bird in the city like
Carloota. Around her...
Squit: I feal feathery
Oh, so feathery
All my plumage is standing up tall.
I'm no peacock
But that doesn't bother me at all.
Squit: Who's that handsome squab in the mirror there?
Pesto: What squab? Where? Who?
Squit: Who can that attractive bird be?
B+P : Which one? Where? Who?
Squit: Oooooh...
B+P : Chirp quack! Clonk cluck!
Squit: It's...
B+P : Chirp queek! Coo coo!
Squit: Me!
Squit: I feel feathery
Oh, so feathery
Like a fledgling, a soft downy dove.
Oh, this pigeon,
Handsome pigeon's
All puffed up with love!
---
There's a Perch for You (parody of There's a Place for Us)
Bobby: Forget about it, Squit. You're a Goodfeather, see?
Bobby: And there's a perch for you
On this statue, for you.
B+P : Forget the chick 'cause she done you wrong
Scorsese's head is where you belong!
BP+S : Coo-coo! Coo-ooo! Coo-COOOOO!
(statue crumbles)
Bobby: (spoken) There's a statue of Coppola down the street.
Transcribed by "The Corinthian" and Will Bell
See also: Coo song.
Lyrics from HELLO NICE WARNERS (Episode 13)
by Paul Rugg
Parody of The Sound of Music
Woman: The hills are quite full
Of big rocks and boulders
With igneous rock
Sedimentary, too
The hills are quite full
Of big rocks and boulders...
(YW+D burst through backdrop)
Transcribed by "The Corinthian"
---Three Little Maids from The Mikado
YW+D : Three little maids from school are we
Pert as a schoolgirl well can be
Filled to the brim with girlish glee-EE
Three little maids from school.
Dot : Everything is a source of fun
Wakko: Nobody's safe 'cause we care for none
Yakko: Life is a joke that has just begun
YW+D : Three little maids from school!
HIP HIPPOS INTRODUCTION (Episode 13)
Duet: The jungle was nice
But way behind the times
For two endangered hippos
With hip and trendy minds
So they flew their ranch rover
To the city's neon glow
Flavio and Marita
The Hip Hippos!
Transcribed by the Corinthian
Lyrics from LA BEHEMOTH (Episode 13)
Music by Steve Bernstein.
Lyrics by Nicholas Hollander.
Music parodies a number of classical tunes.
Marita: Flavio, Flavio, Flavio!
Flavio: Marita, Marita, Marita!
F+M : What shall we do?
What will become of us two?
The help is gone, the maid is through,
What will become of us two?
MaleTB: (spoken) Uh oh. Now who'll clean our cages?
Marita: I'm calling up the agency to find a new housekeeper
Flavio: She's calling up the agency to find a new housekeeper!
Marita: A chambermaid, a gourmet chef, a trendy carpet sweeper
Flavio: A chambermaid, a gourmet chef, a trendy carpet sweeper!
Marita: (spoken) Why are you repeating everything that I am singing?
Flavio: (sung) Why am I repeating everything that you--
(spoken) I do not know.
Marita: (into phone) Hello, hello, Marita Hippo here,
I'm having an emergency
My life is filled with urgency
We need to hire servancy
We need a new housekeeper!
(spoken) But...but...oh, very well.
Flavio: Marita, my poor wilting lily, what is the matter?
Marita: They cannot send us a new maid until Monday morning.
Flavio: Monday morning?!
F+M : (sung) What shall we do?
What will become of us two?
Flavio: (spoken) Have no fear, Marita dear, I have a plan.
Marita: Pray tell, Flavio!
Flavio: (sung) I'll do the windows and push the vacuum
Polish the parlor, scrub out the bathroom!
(spoken) Ung! This is _hard_.
Marita: I will not worry; I will not fear
I'll do laundry until help is here,
Fold the trousers and starch the shirts
And I'll do laundry until it hurts!
(spoken) Aie! This is really not so amusing!
Flavio: Dinner is easy, simple like a dream
Cleaning the chicken, scrubbing the beans!
Add in two tablespoons into a pot,
Stir fry until hot! (BOOM!)
(spoken) Perhaps next time we take out Chinese.
Tbirds: Poor little hippos, husband and wife,
They haven't a clue; they haven't a life.
A tragic conclusion; see how they cry,
Poor hippopotami!
F+M : What will we do?
What will become of me and you?
(doorbell rings, maid returns)
Maid : (spoken) I forgot my featherduster.
Flavio: (sung) We realize we've been wrong; we treated you unfair.
How can we make it up and show you how we care?
F+M : Come clean for us,
Come clean for us,
Come back and clean for us.
We'll give you anything you ask,
Just say you'll clean for us!
Maid : (spoken) Oh, alright.
F+M : (sung) She'll clean for us!
She'll clean for us!
She said she really will!
A happy ending, everyone,
She said she'll clean for us!
MaleTB: (spoken) There's a twist -- an opera with a happy ending.
Transcribed by "The Corinthian" and Bill S. Preston
Lyrics from CHALKBOARD BUNGLE (Episode 16)
by Paul Rugg
Yakko: School!
Dot : School!
Wakko: School!
YW+D : Schoo-oo-oo-oo-ool!
YW+D : Our first day at school
We're eager little learners
So fill our brains with lots of facts
Our first day at school.
Yakko: Teach!
Dot : Teach!
Wakko: Teach!
YW+D : We're ready for our lessons
So teach us Math, Geometry
Don't forget Geography
English Lit. and Chemistry
And please throw in the A-B-C's.
Oh, teacher, teach us nooooow!
Transcribed by "The Corinthian"
Lyrics from ROLL OVER, BEETHOVEN (Episode 17)
by Paul Rugg
We'll Clean Your Flue for You
Y+W : We're the von Warner Brothers
Dot : Und the von Warner Sister, too.
YW+D: We're chimney sweeps extraordinaire
We'll clean your flue for you!
Transcribed by Olivia D. Isaac
---Writin' Hooey (parody of Makin' Whoopie)
Dot: Another tune
Another song
But, old Beethoven
Something's wrong.
He's uninspired
He's very tired
He's writin' hooey.
Transcribed by Raymond Hom
Lyrics from THE CAT AND THE FIDDLE (Episode 17)
by Nicholas Hollander
A Place Called Home
Rita: Somewhere I can hang my hat
Somewhere for a dog and cat
Somewhere, just imagine that
We'll find a place called home.
A place we've been searching for
A place we've been waiting for
So long we've been searching for
So long, a place called home.
They don't see us
They'll never know
But they could be us
Like that [slaps water]
Just like that.
Out here in the shadow's end
Out here is a promised land
Out here we'll all understand
And make this place our home
This place our home.
---
Rita: Out here in the shadow's end
Out here is a promised land
Out here as the day is long
We'll find ourselves a home
R+R : A place called home!
Transcribed by "The Corinthian"