U.N. ME (Episode 72)
Music traditional (Down by the Riverside). Lyrics by John P. McCann.
Yakko: U.N. me, we had a bag of fun
Down by the East Riverside
That United Nations there
Drives away a fella's care
183 countries meet
Down by the East Riverside
New York, off 42nd Street.
Wakko: See foreign states with a grudge
Down by the East Riverside
United Nations tries to fix
Wars, famine, and oil slicks
Boutros Boutros Ghali-gee
Down by the East Riverside
Leads the General Assembly.
Dot : The gift shop will take traveler's checks
Down by the East Riverside
German tourists were not rare
Buying T-shirts and flatware
Ate pastry from Liberia
Down by the East Riverside
At the U.N. cafeteria.
YW+D : Took a tour with some Dutch
Down by the East Riverside
We had a guide from Japan
Who had a decent pension plan
Saw costly artwork from Brazil
Down by the East Riverside
On which my soda I did spill.
U.N. me, we had a bag of fun
Down by the East Riverside
Saw flags on shiny poles
From lands with lofty goals
We'll beat our swords into liverwurst
Down by the East Riverside
But no one wants to be the first
YW+D : But then I guess it could be worse
Wakko: We could still sing one more verse
YW+D : U.N. me!
Transcribed by David Orozco
Lyrics from A HARD DAY'S WARNERS (Episode 73)
by Gordon Bressack and Charles Howell IV
Running From Our Fans (parody of A Hard Day's Night)
Music by Peter Hastings, arranged by Julie Bernstein.
YW+D : You can see that we're black and white
And we are running from our fans
Riding on invisible bikes
And walking on our hands
And everywhere that we go
We get no peace, don't you know
That's why we're running from our fans.
In cartoons
Everything's crazy and wild
In cartoons
We are corrupting your child!
You see we're doing wacky gags
While we are running from our fans
We're hiding behind mags
And we run inside garbage cans
We always get this attention
At a cartoon convention
So we're running from our fans
Yes, we're running from our fans!
---
They Want To Laugh (parody of Can't Buy Me Love)
YW+D : They want to laugh, laugh
They want to laugh, laugh
They want to laugh, laugh, laugh!
Yakko: You say you're gonna make a feature film
With animation really fine
Dot : You say it's gonna be a preachy film
With a heartfelt storyline
Yakko: Just make sure that it's good and funny
Wakko: 'Cause things ought to make you laugh!
YW+D : They want to laugh, laugh
They want to laugh, laugh
They want to laugh, laugh, laugh!
THE TIGER PRINCE (Episode 74)
Music and lyrics by Peter Hastings
Parody of The Circle of Life from The Lion King)
(intro) Ahhh la wain-ya! Ee-malla ee ya away! (chant) Oom balla ee a walla ling goo Ee oola coola yalla din doo Oo day loo ee-a totta malla I know eets joost a lota walla (melody) Ever since we could think for ourselves We've wondered what will happen to us But it can't be foretold What the future will hold If you'll get rich Or get hit by a bus. The surprises in life Keep us on our toes Like a sock in the jaw Like a punch in the nose They keep us guessing They mix it up The surprises The surprises in life. (Yakko drops The Tiger Prince from Proud Slab) Yakko: Ooh... I thought they were supposed to land on their feet.Lyrics provided by the author
ALL THE WORDS IN THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE (Episode 74)
Music traditional (Mexican Hat Dance). Lyrics by Randy Rogel.
Script by Paul Rugg.
Announcer: And now, Yakko Warner sings all of the words in the
English language!
Yakko: Aardvark, abating, abet, abdicating
Abandon, abase and abreast
Ablaze and ablution, abhor and abusion
Abbreviate, abbey, abscessed.
Abduct and ablation, abridge and abrasion
Abash and abrupt and abride
Abscond and absentia, absent, abstentia
Abdomen, ably, abide.
Abominable, abrogate, absolute, absent
Absorbent, abstention, abstraction
Absurd and abundant, abusive, abutment
Acacia, academy, action.
Accede and accost and accept and across
And accompany, acre, accord
Accomplish, account and accrue and amount
Acrimonious, active, adored.
Adrenaline, adulate, adder and advocate
Advertise, adverse, abrade
Advice, adversarial, advent and aerial
Affluent, after, afraid.
Dot : Well, there it is: Yakko Warner now well under way in singing
all the words in the English language. I'm Dot Warner. With
me is Dick Button. Dick, a good start?
Dick : Oh, yes, Dot -- a marvelous start to what is a difficult,
difficult routine.
Dot : Stay tuned, and we'll be back to bring you the whole thing.
---
Yakko: Level and levity, lewd and longevity
Libel, libation, Lanai
Lithium, litigate, legal, legitimate
Liberty, levy and lie.
Dot : Welcome back. Yakko's now at the L's as he tries to sing all
the words in the English language. A slight mistake at the
F's -- here's what it looked like:
Yakko: Facial and faction and fractal and fraction
And fraudulent, fragrant, frappé
Frankincense, frankish and frakisish, frashhh...
Shoot! Yadda yadda flambé!
Dick : Now, that mistake could have proved costly for Yakko, but he
recovered beautifully.
Dot : Now let's watch as Yakko continues with the L's.
Yakko: Libation and libertine, limited, limousine
Limpid and limbo and lime
Lima and lipid and literature, liquid
And listing and liter and line.
There's lobby and loading and loathsome and loaning
And logo and then locomotion
There's lotus and lottery, lobo, lobotomy
Logic and loosen and lotion.
Lozenge and lubber and lucky and lover
And lullaby, lumber and luke
Luster and luscious and lunatic, lustrous
And lurking and lunar and lute.
Dot : Yakko's now about halfway through all the words in the English
language. Dick Button and I will be back with more.
---
Yakko: Zachary, Zanzibar, zappy and zamindar
Zillion and ZIP code and Zen
Zany and zoning and zeal and zirconium
Zodiac, zombie, ze-in.
Dot : Yakko Warner, now moments away from having sung all the words
in the English language. Dick Button, is he going to make it?
Dick : If it was anyone else, I'd say no, but he's young; he's
resilient... We'll just have to see.
Yakko: Zigging and zagging and zealous and zebra
And zenith and zap and zaffer
Zeppelin and zipper and zephyr and zither
Then zinc and zombini
And zoo and zucchini
And Zulu and Zorro
Then zit and zamoro
And zero and zoom and... ugh!
Dot : Guess not!
Yakko: Wait!
...Zaire!
Dot : He did it! Yakko Warner has just sung all the words in the
English language!
Dick : Hey, congratulations, Yakko.
Yakko: Thanks, Dick.
Dick : Join us next time, when Yakko Warner will sing all of the
numbers above zero. Goodnight!
THE KID IN THE LID (Episode 74)
Musical score by Steve Bernstein.
Words by Paul Rugg and Tom Ruegger.
Boy : It was hotter than blazes
About a hundred and ten
So we stayed in the house
In the air conditionin'.
We just hung around
My sister and me
And watched countless hours
Of daytime TV.
Too hot to go out
We'd melt in the sun
So we stared at the tube
Which isn't much fun.
All we could do was watch, watch
Watch, watch
'Til I spilled lots of soda
All over my crotch.
Then we heard a kaboom
That kaboom shook the room
We turned
And into our house something slid.
A strange-looking fellow
The Kid in the Lid
And he said to us
Yakko: "Oops. Now look what I did.
"Now, we all know it's hot
And you don't have a pool
But there are lots of fun things
We can do that are cool.
"The first silly thing we can do..."
Boy : Said the kid
Yakko: "...is play with some glue!"
Boy : Said the kid in the lid.
Yakko: "Lots of wet glue
We'll make a big mess
We'll glue things together
Your parents will stress."
Boy : But our parents were out
They were gone for a week
To be truthful
They'd been gone for a 90-day streak.
The last that we heard
They were in the Bahamas
Leaving us here
To face childhood traumas.
As for playing with glue
My sis said
Girl : "Let's do it!"
Boy : "Kids need to have fun"
I shouted, "Let's glue it!"
But our pet woodchuck said
CWood: "No, that kid has to leave
Open the door
And give him the heave.
"He doesn't seem normal
He doesn't seem well
Besides that, his pants
Have a real funny smell."
Yakko: "Hey, woodchuck, calm down
Just relax"
Boy : said the kid
Yakko: "It's you who smells bad"
Boy : Said the kid in the lid.
Yakko: "I bet you've not washed
In at least seven months
So I strongly suggest
That we bathe you at once.
"In the tub..."
Boy : said the kid
Yakko: "...goes the smelly woodchuck
Use lots of shampoo
To cut through all the muck."
CWood: "No, stop!"
Boy : yelled our woodchuck
CWood: "Get me out of this tub!"
Boy : As the water got deeper
The woodchuck went
CWood: "Blub!"
Yakko: "It's OK"
Boy : said the kid
Yakko: "I won't let you drown
I'll pull on this chain
So the water goes down.
"And the woodchuck goes too
And he goes down the drain
And comes out the potty
In considerable pain."
Boy : Then the toilet exploded
A messy disaster
The water rose up
And wrecked all the plaster.
It surged down the hallway
And flooded the den
It filled up the kitchen
And bedrooms and then...
It splashed out the door
And into the street
Where it provided relief
From the afternoon heat.
Kids came from all over
To splash in the lake
Not knowing the source
Was our potty break.
Girl : "They're swimming in water
Straight out of our toilet!"
Boy : "Think we should tell 'em?"
Yakko: "Nah! That'd just spoil it!"
CWood: "Ooh! You're going to get it!"
Boy : Said our woodchuck, upset
CWood: "You ruined our house
And got everything wet!
"I think you're insane
You're rude and you're naughty
To make matters worse
I'm stuck in this potty!"
Yakko: "Perhaps you should nap
You need sleep"
Boy : said the kid
Then all of us watched
As that kid closed the lid.
Then he went running off
And in less than an hour
The kid had come back
With a small water tower.
Yakko: "I've returned"
Boy : said the kid
Yakko: "I've returned with this tower
It would have been sooner
But I needed a shower."
Boy : He opened the top
And shouted
Yakko: "Let's play!"
Boy : Then out sprang two kids
Who responded
W+D : "OK!"
Yakko: "These two are my sibs
They're fun; wait and see
May I proudly present
Kid Two and Kid Three?"
Boy : They gave us a kiss
Then said
W+D : "Helloooo, nurse!"
Boy : "The first kid was trouble
But these two seem worse!"
"Hi! How're you doing?
That's Mary; I'm Scooter"
Kid Two looked at Mary
Then whispered
Dot : "I'm cuter."
Boy : Then they ran all around
Doing impossible feats
Acting like kids
Who've had too many sweets.
Kid Three said
Wakko: "I'm hungry"
Boy : His eyes started twitchin'
He shot out the room
And ran into the kitchen.
He opened the cupboards
And then started chewing
On cans of tomatoes
And carrots for stewing.
He gulped down the flour
Some dry macaroni
Three bottles of ketchup
And then Rice-A-Roni!
Dot : "The San Francisco Treat!"
Boy : He ate all the dishes
But didn't stop there
He swallowed the sink
Then our new Frigidare.
Wakko: "Ahh! Hey, that was delicious
Thanks for the snacks
I'm hypoglycaemic
I get munchie attacks."
Boy : Then we heard a loud blast
And ran out the door
Those three crazy kids
Were now playing war!
Girl : "Oh no! You must stop this!"
Boy : Said Sis to Kid Two
Girl : "It's this sort of playing
You just must not do!"
Dot : "I'm sorry; we can't
It's too late; we've begun
We always play war
Until somebody's won."
Boy : Then the walls started cracking
And the ceiling gave in
We ran out the door
As the whole house caved in.
Then, oh! what bad timing
For, right then and there
Our parents returned
So we said a quick prayer.
B+G : "Don't let them be angry"
Boy : We said it again
B+G : "Don't let them be angry
Oh, please, please! Amen."
Boy : Our parents were dazed
They stood there dumbfounded
As they looked at the damage
We knew we'd be grounded.
Yakko: "Well, that was some fun
But enough for one day
Give us a call
And we'll come back to play."
(YW+D leave for a moment and kids begin to cry.)
Wakko: "Ha ha ha! We got ya!"
Dot : "Yeah. We were just kiddin'."
Yakko: "We'll rebuild your house
And then paint it with Glidden."
Dot : "The San Francisco Treat!"
Boy : And that's what they did
And in less than a jiffy
The house was rebuilt
And it looked really spiffy.
That night, we ate well
It had been quite a day
But now life was happy
It was all A-OK.
CWood: "Hello? Hello???
Anyone? Anybody?
Can anyone hear me?
I'm still in the potty!"